Yesterday we told our congregation that after forty years in full-time ministry and thirteen years at Manteo First Assembly, we are retiring.
We are selling our home in Manteo and buying Steve’s parent’s house in Charlotte. Our last Sunday at the church will be September 11.
As you can imagine, those few, matter-of-fact sentences carry with them a plethora of emotions and background stories which I’ll fill you in on as we go along.
About six months ago, Sarah and Gage told us that they would be leaving Manteo at some point in 2022 and moving to . . . wait for it . . . Charlotte! And so, even though we didn’t plan it that way, we will once more be living in the same town as our kids. Hooray!
Sarah and Gage chose Charlotte because three of Gage’s brothers have recently moved there and they’re going to form their own Long Family Tribe together. The cost of living on the Outer Banks is high and housing for a young couple starting out is almost impossible to find so Sarah and Gage wanted to try out a new area and try on some new adventures. (By the way, if anyone has any leads on apartments or small houses in Charlotte for Sarah and Gage, please be in touch.)
Although this is an exciting season for us all, I’m sure you can imagine the myriad emotions swirling underneath it all. Steve and I are leaving behind a church, a house, a town, and a community we love. In our 60s, we will be starting from scratch as far as finding new friends and building a new community. We will not be able to fully retire yet, so we will both be looking for part-time jobs and of course, will be finding a church to attend.
And the logistics of getting one house fixed up to sell along with getting a second house (six hours away) cleared out and fixed up to move into, while still pastoring are more than a little daunting.
We’ve known we were going to make this change for several months and it has been so hard not being able to tell anyone apart from family members and a few close friends. But after Steve told the church board last week and we announced it to the congregation yesterday (along with the news about Sarah and Gage’s departure), we can finally spread the news.
The hardest part for me was after the service when the little girls (from my Wednesday night class) came up to me in tears, saying how much they were going to miss us. It’s nice to be missed but it’s sure hard when those goodbyes start.
Another reason I am relieved that the news has finally been shared with the church is that I am finally able to share it here on Smithellaneous. It was tough to have known about this change for several months and not be able to write about it here.
Gage’s family happened to be in the area on vacation last weekend and so were able to be in the service with us when the announcements were made yesterday.
We had them over for dinner Friday night.
Our conversation throughout the two-hour dinner covered topics like theology, movies, science, music, disc golf, and atheism, along with funny real-life stories. Two things that were extra great about the evening: 1. there was not one cell phone in sight 2. when someone talked, everyone else listened quietly and intently.
There is an enormous dearth of good listeners in this world and Steve and I so appreciate the way the Long parents have raised their sons to listen–and listen well.
We are so blessed to get along so well with the family Sarah married into. And the fact that both parents are in full-time ministry is cool, too.
I love this photo so much with Sarah tucked in beside her husband and among her new brothers and everyone else connected to someone else by touch. So much love and camaraderie there.
Just for reference, Nick (to Gage’s left) is the one who took Sarah and Gage’s creative engagement pictures.
And speaking of creative Long brothers here is a short video clip of a game that Gage designed and built for Kid’s Church. It was gratifying for him to see his brothers try it out and have so much fun with it. When something is brother-approved, you know it’s good!
After the service today, a couple of the kids told Gage he had to leave the game behind. So it’s brother-approved and kid-approved. The ultimate kudos from the kiddos.
So that’s all the (really) big news for today. Our lives are about to enter crazy, chaotic warp mode as almost everything that is familiar is changed. But it will also be a joyful adventure as we start a new season and see what all is ahead for us.
What about you?
What huge change have you made in the past?
How did it go?
Any good tips for dealing with big change?
Also, any good packing/moving tips? I’m slightly overwhelmed with that whole process.
Have you considered keeping your home as a vacation rental? I believe you live in a beautiful area that attracts visitors? Could be a great passive income.
Willa,
Yes, that is a wonderful idea and one that we considered strongly for about eight weeks. In the end, though, with the seller’s market so strong, we finally made the decision to sell. It should be on the market in less than a month.
Congratulations on your retirement! Wishing you both luck in all your future endeavors. That’s so great that Sarah and Gage will be moving to Charlotte too!
I’m sure your house will sell quickly as the housing market is crazy right now. You’re lucky to be able to buy Steve’s parents house. We have been looking for a house for year now here in Michigan after getting that three feet of sewage for the fourth time in 40 years, but have not been able to find anything. It’s really discouraging. I panic every time they call for heavy rain!
Prayers for all to go smoothly for you all with the move!
Kari,
Three feet of sewage four times? Oh my. I can only imagine how much you want to move and no longer have to dread heavy rain. Hoping something opens up for you soon!
Thanks for your encouraging words about this transition!
Life is so interesting with the twists and turns that God throws our way. I felt emotional just reading the news – I can only imagine the emotions for you as a family and your church family is feeling. Praying for all God’s blessings to rain down on you all as you close one chapter only to start another (has anyone told you that you should write a book?? 😉 I look forward to reading the updates that are sure to follow.
Monique,
Twists. Turns. Emotions. Chapters closing and opening.
Yep. You summed it up well! 🙂 (And yes, a book has been in the back of my mind for a long time.)
Congratulations on all the new decisions! It’s going to be a busy year. So happy for you all and look forward to the blog updates!
Lesley,
Busy is right but as you said it’s really good blog fodder! 🙂
Wow, big changes! Best wishes to everyone! I’ve been a longtime follower (since maybe 2004ish) but I think this is only my second time commenting! I live in Blacksburg, VA, and prior to having kids, my husband and I often took day and weekend trips to Charlotte, particularly to eat at Sonny’s Barbecue (his favorite) and load up on household items at IKEA. One day when we don’t have toddlers, we will make it back! I’m also with you on the mountains. I love seeing them as the backdrop every time I leave my house!
Kelly,
A long-time follower and an infrequent commenter. So nice to hear from you!
Hard to believe but I have NEVER been in an IKEA. I guess since I’m moving near one, I will have to check it out–also, Sonny’s Barbecue. Thanks for the tips about our new town.
Enjoy those sweet toddlers! 🙂
WOW! I read your retirement announcement on Facebook before reading your blog, and was surprised by your retirement/relocation announcement. Then I thought about how much you would miss Sarah & Gage being so far away. Then I come here and what a happy surprise to find you will still be near Sarah & Gage. As a beach lover, it would be so hard for me to leave an area as beautiful as the OBX, but I completely understand. And I would venture to say in addition to more housing choices for young people, there are probably a lot more career opportunities too. I do NOT envy you preparing a home to move into so far away while getting your current house ready to sell. But if the real estate market is anything like it is here in Texas, you’ll sell very quickly and for a really good price. Wishing you peace as you begin this hectic season.
Sue Ellen,
As much as I have loved living in this beautiful spot, I’m getting excited about moving nearer the mountains with lots of hills and backroads for my meanderings. And yes, “happy surprise” is a great phrase for still getting to live near Sarah and Gage! 🙂
Already made a comment, but am assuming in buying Steve’s parents home, that it will go quickly. How much fun it will be to make his home that you have visited so many times in the past – your home.
Sharyn,
Yes, thankfully it will just be a matter of signing papers to buy out Steve’s brothers. Don’t even need a realtor.
Wow, that is BIG, BIG news. I wish each of you the best the Lord can give you in this “exciting” change in your lives. Lots of boxes from the grocery store{s}. Guess pack stuff now that you don’t use or rarely use and get that out of the way. My dad was a pastor and I remember when we were moving from this huge house to live in a trailer house. Mom loved to decorate and move furniture around and I remember her standing in front of the big picture window – crying. From a 3 story home to a 48′ trailer was hard for her. They eventually moved again to serve in Kansas – to another 3 story home. She was a happy camper. That Gage – one of these days something he makes will be on the market. What a creative guy. Will be praying that your house will sell quickly and that buying your new home will also be quick.
Sharyn,
Oh my. Your word snapshot about your mom crying in front of the big picture window really hit my heart. As one who moved from a 3-bedroom home to a 40-foot RV, I can relate. So glad she eventually got to transition back to a larger home.
Blessings and best wishes for your retirement! That surprised me. I thought perhaps Sarah and Gage might take over the Charlotte house and start a life there. I thought you’d stay a few more years in Manteo and then go to Florida Wow! Charlotte for semiretirement!
Again best wishes.
Catherine,
Yes, going to Florida and being near the grandkids was definitely an enticement but I love NC too much to leave. And besides, kids and grandkids don’t always stay in the same place forever so I wouldn’t want to chase them around the country. 🙂 Good news is that we are moving 4 hours closer to them which means we can both do the trip in a day instead of staying overnight so we can see them more often.
Congratulations on your semi-retirement. I’m sure both of you will have no trouble finding a part time job in Charlotte with your many talents. Glad that Sarah and Gage will also be moving there at some point.
My biggest move was probably when I moved from Missouri to Louisville, Kentucky. I had lived in Missouri all my life, I was 43 at the time. Then a little over three years later, I moved to Tampa, Florida. I will say it’s hard making friends at that age, especially since i was single with no kids.
My advice – purge before you pack. My last move to Kansas happened pretty quickly and I wasn’t able to get rid of a lot of things I should have. I think I am still working on that eight years later. I don’t have a lot of advice on packing as my last three moves were all job related and the company paid to have me packed. That can be good and bad. When my sister-in-law and niece were unpacking my books for me, they laughed because each book had been wrapped in paper like you would wrap fragile items.
Phyllis,
You are kidding! They wrapped every book in tissue paper? I can’t begin to imagine the reasoning behind that. But lucky for you for having someone else move you. I’m jealous!
We are definitely purging, purging, purging every day. It’s a good feeling to see things go out the door.
How exciting! Change is good, especially well thought out change. I’m very happy for you, Steve, Sarah and Gage. I immediately thought about the convenience for the Florida Smith family, flying into Charlotte without having to make the long drive to the NC Outer Banks. Now that’s positive change! You will also be much closer to beautiful Western North Carolina. There are so many wonderful adventures ahead for you and your family! You will enjoy the convenience of taking day trips to awesome ‘small towns’ in Western NC. Two of my favorites are Burnsville and Spruce Pine. There are many, many more. Life is Good in Western NC!!
Gloria,
Yes, being 20 minutes from the airport instead of 2 hours will be wonderful, indeed!
And you read my mind about day trips to small towns. As much as I’ve loved the Outer Banks, I am looking forward to less flat land and more hills and mountains. Very excited about my future meanderings. 🙂
I miss you already. And we never had a chance to go to thrift stores together. As we have never lived in the same town but have remained friends, I do not anticipate that ending, ever. Keep my mobile phone close and when in the RDU area give me a call.
Barbara Jo,
Thank you for your sweet words; it has been great getting to know you over the years of your coming and going in and out of Manteo. Will keep your number handy!
Big doings for the Smiths!!!!
With regards to moving…label all the boxes! We recently moved my mother and it was pretty tough but she cleaned out SOOO much stuff so that was a relief. 50 years of “stuff” and memories…
And how fun (and bittersweet) to be moving into Steve’s parents home. Making more memories in a home full of them…just lovely.
Good luck! Many prayers!
Suzanne,
Yes, we are excited about moving into a home that has so many memories for both of us. Since Steve and I have traveled so much in our lives, going to a place with history is huge.
Good for your mom for cleaning out; that is huge. That is what I am trying to work on every day. Got rid of 15 pair of shoes today. Hooray!
WOW! Excited for you all! Tips? Keep your eyes on Jesus, breathe, and label each box in detail!
Guerrina,
I like that your advice was spiritual AND practical. Thank you! 🙂
What exciting news! I can’t believe yall have been at Manteo for 13 years, though!!!
Good luck with the house sale and the house purchase and the new friendships, and also to Sarah and Gage as they adventure with you!
Stefanie,
Yes, thirteen years has gone by quickly. Hard to believe I was 47 when we came here.
Thanks for your encouragements about our adventurings!
Congratulations!! I’m really happy for you. I feel like it was just a few years ago I was reading about your moving to Manteo and now here you are! I’m looking forward to leading about Charlotte through your eyes and seeing the beautiful photos I know you’ll take.
Jenna,
We can explore Charlotte together!
Wow, that was a shocker! I can’t believe you’ve been there that long, I remember when you first went over to meet the congregation, we are also in the process of selling our house in the Raleigh area, and moving to, well ,we are not sure yet, just want to get out of Raleigh…my husband is a nut when it comes to selling, we had the inside repainted, got new carpeting, got rid of a lot of furniture as we are downsizing….my advice is to get rid of a lot of stuff and then pack up one room at a time…..and my great niece and her young family live in the Charlotte area, are Sarah and Gage looking to rent or own because I can ask her for the name of a realtor…..they love their area and have 2 girls that go to school there…..so many changes for y’all this year….just…wow…
Dale,
Yes, the best advice ever is to get rid of stuff!! Why move things you don’t use? Steve and I are being very diligent about that as we pack. Good luck to you all wherever you end up. Sounds like you’ve got some adventures ahead, too!
At this point Sarah and Gage are not looking to buy; they are going to rent and try out Charlotte for a while and see how they like the fit.
Congratulations! We started our new adventure of full time RV living in our 60s and have not looked back! It was very difficult letting go of all the “stuff” in the house but in the end we have our memories and really did not need those things. I know you full timed for many years while raising your children and we weren’t sure how you did it. We make new friends and have new adventures at every stop but still enjoy when we can get together with our old friends. Enjoy your new home, having more time for yourselves and your new adventure! Take Care!
Ginny,
I don’t know how we did it either, living full-time on the road with kids. 🙂 But as you said, the memories we made were worth it all.
Traveling and seeing the whole country would be a dream of mine; so much wonderful stuff to see out there. Hugs to you both.
Wow! That is some exciting stuff!! You will only be 2 hours away from me! 🙂
I’m really not sure why it posted from my pastor’s blog? Anywho, this is Tammy Wright. Very excited for you all!!
Tammy,
Well, that is very odd to post from someone else’s blog! I’m glad you identified yourself. 🙂
Great to hear from you.
Wow! Just… Wow! That is BIG news! I live in Mount Airy, NC and that is only an hour and a half from Charlotte. I don’t envy you for all the packing and moving you will be starting. I pray everything goes really smoothly and that Sarah and Gage will find a home they love. Congratulations on the retirement and may God bless you and guide you all in your new endeavors.
Kaye,
Yes, new adventures are fun but the packing–not so much! Even though the move is 6 weeks away, I’ve already got one room about 80% packed so that’s a good feeling.
Congratulations on your upcoming retirement!! The move to Charlotte sounds exciting, especially since Gage and Sarah will be there too.
We both recently fully retired and it was a HUGE change. It’s been 5 months and I think I’m finally adjusted. 😊
Our really big change is upcoming as well. Next spring we will begin looking for a house in Lincoln where our kids and grandkids live. We’ve been in our home since 1982 so it will be a bittersweet but exciting change.
Lee Anne,
Oh wow. Such a great thing to look forward to.
But so many memories in those walls where you are. Tough and happy transition.
So big news. I hope the move goes well . Also Even when you move you can always visit the friends you made and keep in touch. I hope you find a great community in Charlotte!
Katrina,
Yes, 6 hours isn’t too far to come back for visits. We’ll have friends here and make friends there so it’s a win-win!
What a wonderful news! When I moved from CA to Saint Cloud I used pods to move my belongings, that was pretty easy. It surely was an adjustment, but I would never move back. To many fires there. I still do not enjoy the snow, but hopefully we will have a mild winter. Congratulations to all of you!
Cindy,
Yeah, I’ve been reading about pods. Looks like an efficient idea.
Trading fire for snow? Guess you got the better end of the deal. 🙂
My biggest change was a chain of changes. Married at 50 for the first time and moving out of the only home I had lived in. 6 months later, my father died. 3 years later my husband retired and we moved from CA (my childhood home) to MI (his childhood home), and my mother died. I loved MI from the start and we bought a house in a rural area. I love the season, the birds, the space, the lack of smog and traffic. I miss my friends in CA and the beach, but love Michigan. I have made some friends, gotten to know my husbands friends, but it isn’t the same without that shared history of living in the same area for 53 years.
I do get nostalgic sometimes for CA, but I deal with the change by embracing the new. Find new things to do that you hadn’t done before. Look into local activities and history of the area. Fixing up our new home, which we are still doing after 12 years here.
Tips on packing come from my husband who did most of the packing. Pack by rooms and label each box with the room it is to go to. Tons of bubble wrap and plastic wrap. My husband wrapped most breakables with bubble wrap and they secured it with plastic wrap. It worked really well. We saved the bubble wrap and I am now reusing it for items I sell on Etsy. If you are doing the move yourself then any boxes will do. If you are having a moving van come then buying boxes from U-Haul works great. They are evenly sized and the mover will be able to stack them much easier. My brother used the Pod system to move and he liked that. They deliver a pod to you, you pack it, and they move it to your new location and you unpack it. Fortunately our last church paid for final moves of pastors and having the movers come was great.
Prayers for an easy move and transition to your new home.
Patti,
That is definitely quite a chain of change. With the first 50 years single in one place, I imagine you thought you would be that way forever. And then–bam! Love shows up. 🙂
You have done amazingly well navigating these past few years of just about every part of your life shifting. Good for you for embracing the newness and making the latter part of your life into an adventure!
I love your husband’s idea of wrapping the bubble wrap with plastic wrap instead of taping it. Will have to remember that.
Best of luck to everyone in there moves. God Bless you all.
Fran–thanks so much!
Since I retired, my middle name has changed to CHANGE! I’ve sold a house, moved across the country to live in an apartment, bought a house near the apartment and moved to there, sold that house and moved a few miles into an apartment in another state, moved back across the country to an apartment nearby, then bought a condo apartment and moved there, which is here. Friend-wise, this has been the easiest move because I’m about 6 miles from where I grew up, and I see friends from high school quite frequently. I’m confident that new friends will flock to you very quickly!
Jan,
We need to give you some sort of Moving Award. Wow! So glad you’ve settled down in a place you love surrounded by people you’ve known for many decades. The best of all worlds.
I had to count on my fingers… is 7 decades a long time to know people? I never thought of it in decades, but when I counted I was floored, and I can’t stop laughting!
Jan,
Well, I’m sure glad to hear you got your giggle today! 🙂
Oh wow!! Abby is moving to Charlotte October 1st, because she will be starting her new job at PWC. She has a roommate and they will be living in the 110 South apartment complex, which is close to the light rail, and in the south end of Charlotte, where, supposedly lots of young adults live, and is safe… So exciting that you guys will be there as well!! Maybe we can actually meet for coffee or lunch one weekend if we are there to visit Abby… So exciting that Sarah and Gage will be there as well, and his brothers too!! I look forward to reading about all the adventures, and hopefully being able to see you guys at some point since you will be in the same city as my Abby… good luck over the next little bit, and if you need help with anything, moving or otherwise, please let me know… happy to come help you guys get moved, or whatever!! Take care,
Tiffany,
That sounds like an impressive job for her. I know you’re proud of her and her accomplishments.
Sure–we’d love to meet for coffee when you’re in the area. You know how to reach me! And Abby can always feel free to call on us if she needs something. Blessings.