Frustration in a Whisper

January 21, 2020

Just wanted to share a quick update:

I was able to get into an Urgent Care Center yesterday.  Turns out I was running a pretty good fever and also had some gunk collecting in the upper lobes of my lungs. So it’s a good thing I didn’t “tough it out,” which is usually my first inclination.  The doctor put me on a broad-spectrum antibiotic and a high dose of steroids.

I have only been able to speak in a whisper for three days which has been a bit disconcerting.  And because I couldn’t talk, Steve had to call Duke this morning to cancel the appointment and reschedule. (We couldn’t cancel yesterday because of MLK Day.) 

The woman he was talking to was very helpful and said cheerily, “Yes sir, I’d be happy to reschedule your wife with Dr. Marshall. His next availability is in September.”

When Steve covered the phone to tell me that news, I emitted a howl of frustration which, when done a whisper, loses a little of its impact.   But my heart was howling and it was not in a whisper.

He listened to her for a little longer and then said, “March 10th?  Yes, that will  definitely work.” (Turns out the phone lady had just discovered a cancellation.)

Although I’m grateful to not have to wait until September, I am still going to keep calling to check on cancellations.  I called at least a dozen times before this last one but cancellations for this particular doctor seem to be rare. Which makes the fact that I couldn’t make this appointment today all the more frustrating.

I couldn’t sleep last night because of the steroid and I seriously thought about getting out of bed at 3 a.m. and hitting the road for Duke.  The only thing stopping me was that I’d had a fever and so was still considered contagious. And also that my brain was bleary from meds. And also, I was exhausted and shivery. And also, I couldn’t talk.

But other than those few, small factors, I couldn’t think of any good reason not to go.

On today’s agenda is staying at home, coughing, sleeping and wishing myself strong. Thanks to everyone who left such sweet and supportive comments yesterday; you all are the best.

And since every post needs a photo . . .

here is one of Nathan and Madison going on a daddy/daughter date to see Frozen 2.  I love this photo in about a hundred different ways.

 

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38 comments so far.

38 responses to “Frustration in a Whisper”

  1. Linda in Pittsburgh says:

    Oh, I forgot to say how much I enjoyed Christmas photos and family picture session. The grandsmiths are all so cute. Loved the Nativity scene with the Smith and Hawley children. And the daddy/daughter date photo is just shouts “LOVE”
    Linda in Pittsburgh

  2. Linda in Pittsburgh says:

    Becky,
    So sorry you had to miss your Duke appointment, but glad you were able to go to Urgent Care and be seen and on the road to recovery. It is hard to wait until March after waiting so long for the original appointment, but God works in mysterious ways and I’m sure He had his reasons for you missing that appointment. I know that all things happen for a reason and in God’s time even though we can’t always see the reason as it is happening. Hope you are feeling better soon and that something opens up earlier at Duke. As always, I am praying for you. Hugs and happy thoughts.
    Linda in Pittsburgh

    • Becky says:

      Linda,

      You summed it up well about it being extra hard to wait till March since I’d already waited so long for the January appointment. I know six weeks doesn’t seem like a long time to most people but it seems pretty long to me!

  3. Catherine says:

    Love Nathan and Madison having a daughter / daddy date. Cute picture. Hope you’re starting to feel a little better each day. Steroids are such a difficult medication to take. I can never sleep with it and I just want to eat. I will pray that the doctor has a cancellation and are able to see him sooner. Feel better.

    • Becky says:

      Catherine,

      Yeah, I agree. Steroids are a mixed blessing. They definitely help but do tend to wire a person up. I’m just thankful to have access to good medicine and also thankful to be feeling stronger today!

  4. Lesley says:

    Glad I checked in to see if there was an update. You are always so thoughtful in regards to your readers. Thank goodness you went to urgent care. As we get older, never mind your lung issues, toughing it out becomes more and more risky. Steroids are strong but so effective generally. If there was junk in your lungs, you’re gonna be coughing a lot as it clears. Remember to drink a lot of fluids to help thin the ‘junk’.
    I get the temptation to just get in the car and drive to Duke. So hard but glad to hear there’s a March appt and maybe you can still get in sooner if you keep calling. If it is meant to be, it will happen.
    Such an adorable photo! They both look so happy and her little hand on his leg just makes the shot.
    Hang in there and hoping you rebound quickly.

    • Becky says:

      Lesley,

      Thanks for your empathetic comment and good advice, especially the reminder to NOT tough it out.

      I know–I love Madi’s hand on Nathan’s leg, too. So unrehearsed and spontaneous and sweet.

  5. Mary says:

    Glad you went to the doctor and are on the road to recovery. I work with preschool children who are notoriously germy and generally rinse my mouth with Listerine most nights. The bottle says it kills the germs that cause bad breath. I figure it will also kill illness germs although there is no scientific proof what so ever that it does. I generally don’t get sick. I hope you feel better soon. Madi and her dad look great.

    • Becky says:

      Mary,

      Listerine is an interesting idea! I work at a preschool a few hours a week, too, and there is enough coughing and sneezing going on for a whole army! I read that someone put a little antibiotic cream in the inside edge of their nose every morning to try to stave off germs entering through that route. All sorts of ideas!

  6. krista121799 says:

    Oh…and I forgot to mention this in my last comment, but I love your new header. It’s so homey feeling!

  7. krista121799 says:

    I’m so glad you went in. It sounds like the “sickness” is not just here in the frigid country. I’m still praying that you will be up and at ’em in no time.
    And I’m glad that you don’t have to wait until September! Oh, and I also have no idea why you didn’t head to Duke at 3am. =)
    LOVE that photo and the fact that they are on a date. That is such a special time for them.

    Continued prayers!

    • Becky says:

      Krista,

      Yep, no reason whatsoever why I shouldn’t have left for Duke at 3 a.m. None at all! 🙂

      Thanks for the comment and the prayers.

  8. dmantik says:

    Adding our love and prayers! ♡

    Deb

  9. SueEllen says:

    Thank you for updating us in the midst of feeling so poorly. I pray the meds bring healing and relief soon. How wonderful you were able to reschedule your appointment relatively soon! I hope you are able to get some rest tonight. Continued prayers for your health and healing.

  10. Michele says:

    I am so glad you got to the doctor’s and got started on the med before you got worse.Hopefully you will start to feel better soon. I work in a doctor’s office and there is so much going around these days. we have a lot staff out sick as well. Knock on wood I am staying healthy so far. I am sorry Duke had to be delayed but it will be March before you know it. I love that picture of Nathan and Maddy. Prayers for a quick recovery for you.

    • Becky says:

      Michele,

      I’ve always wondered how people who work in a doctor’s office stay healthy. Good for you for evading those germs!

      I am thankful for every single person who works in health care.

  11. Guerrina says:

    Ack, frustrating for sure, but I believe God has a reason and a plan. Prayers up for healing!

  12. Becky says:

    I’m sorry you are sick and couldn’t make your appointment. I’m praying you feel better soon and praying an opening becomes available before too long.

  13. Donna says:

    Prayers that you start feeling better soon! And I hate you can’t see the Duke Dr for a couple of months but much better than September! In like you, I would call to see if there are any cancellations. Such a lovely picture of a dad and his beautiful curly headed daughter! So precious!

  14. Gail Puckett says:

    Becky so very sorry about the Duke appointment I know you wanted answers. God always has a way of working things out for the best. Praying for a quick cancellation so you can get in sooner and praying you feel better soon Precious photo of Nathan and Madison. I so enjoyed your holiday pictures. You are most certainly blessed

  15. Sharyn McDonald says:

    Yes, those appointments are so difficult to reschedule. Husband had another kidney stone and had to reschedule, only next appointment was 2 months from then. Ouch. But PTL, there was a cancellation and it was for 2 weeks away. He had the surgery (hoping the last of those stones) and is doing great. (This was late Spring, last year). We continue to pray. Where two or three are gathered . . . we who respond to your blog are not gathered in one place, but gathered together in prayer for you. May His peace surround you.

    • Becky says:

      Sharyn,

      It’s triply difficult to wait on an appointment when you are in pain! So glad your husband’s doctor had a cancellation.

      Also glad that we can “gather” to pray for each other without being in the same room. Great reminder!

  16. LeeAnne says:

    Awwwww!! I love that Nathan is taking her out, just her. Those times are special and needed; what a great daddy! They both look like they are happy, excited and ready to go. 🙂

    Prayers for you Becky, that you heal quickly and leave that sickness junk far behind you. I’m especially glad to hear that there was an opening in March! As that date approaches, if it were me, I would probably be inclined to wear a mask or lock myself in the house with the hand sanitizer and Lysol spray. Or both. Lol

    Hang in there!!

  17. Phyllis says:

    Glad you broke down and went to urgent care. I don’t think you would have gotten over that without meds. I have the same issue with steroids, I sleep an hour, awake a couple, repeat. Hopefully there will be a cancellation. At least March is only 2 months off instead of 8 for September! Take care.

    • Becky says:

      Phyllis,

      Steroids are powerful meds; hopefully they will do the trick!

      And yes–very thankful to “only” have to wait 2 months instead of 8.

  18. Shannon says:

    While I’m battling a cold myself, I could say I know how you feel about coughing and medicine fuzzy head. However our colds maybe the same, they are affecting us definitely different. I will keep you in my prayers for a speedy recovery.

  19. Ann Martin says:

    Praying you will be better soon. God knows you need rest and I guess you have no choice but to get it. Take care and keep trusting. The picture is precious. ???

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