As I write this in my in-law’s living room, I can hear the conversation in the kitchen between Sarah and Vernie. They are sitting at the table drinking coffee and covering a wide variety of topics–a sweet sound with which to start my day. (And by the way, happy, happy birthday to Vernie today!)
I dropped Nathan off at the airport early this morning. Having him here was an incredible joy. He got to visit Ken twice and it meant so much to them both.
Of course, Sarah was thrilled to have him here. They went down to the creek behind the house together where they used to ramble about when they were kids. I’ll have a few more photos from their time together in later posts.
Sweet memories made at the house; sweet memories made at the hospital where Ken continues to hold on to life, even as it fades daily to a dimmer glow.
Since they are now allowing two of us to go up at a time, Steve and I went and sang with Ken yesterday afternoon.
His favorite song was “Because He Lives.” The song has definitely been sung more beautifully in other settings since Steve’s and my rendition was frequently interrupted with tears.
But those words! How could anyone not cry singing these sentiments at the bedside of a headed-for-heaven loved one?
Ken’s lips would move along with us from time to time, his eyes fixed first on Steve and then on me. Those eyes held a stillness, an intensity, and a luminosity that can only be found on the face of someone who is looking far beyond the walls of their room into the rooms of eternity.
Steve has been helping his mom with decisions, phone calls, repairs around the house, moral support, a listening ear, and trips to and from the hospital.
Sarah and I fill in the blanks where we can, getting groceries, cooking, doing dishes, and of course, paying visits to this handsome fella.
Steve has told his dad several times that he will be going to heaven soon. We are so thankful for that wonderful reality that he will live far beyond the walls of the hospital and far beyond the reaches of death–because HE lives.
I’m glad for the Smiths that you are able to spend time together in his last days. One of the things about the pandemic that has been most upsetting has been how many people have been in situations that require them to die without family. Being together at the end was something we (as a society) maybe didn’t fully appreciate during normal times, but it’s something to feel especially grateful for now.
Xoxo
Ellen,
You’re exactly right about it being beyond upsetting for people to die without family. Unimaginable stress and compounded grief. We TRULY appreciate that we were allowed to see him.
Becky,
So glad that you are all able to be there to support each other with love, prayers, memories, hope and so much more. I am glad that Nathan was able to be there and I’m sure his visits with Ken were very special and important to both of them. Keeping all of you in my prayers.
Love, hope and hugs to you all.
Linda in Pittsburgh
Linda,
Love, prayers, memories, and hope. That’s a great description of our time together. Thanks for your encouraging words and prayers.
By the way, I made the typo changes indicated in your other comment to this comment. Yes, autocorrect can be very uncooperative sometimes! 🙂
As always, your photos and words were perfect – and left me with tears in my eyes. My favorite pic was Pastor Steve singing to his dad. {{virtual hugs to you and family}}
Fred,
Yes, I loved to see Steve singing. He and his dad shared a love for music their whole lives; so wonderful to see them enjoying it together at the end.
Prayers to all the Smiths in this time. I hope you feel the presence of the spirit surrounding Ken and all of you as he makes his way heavenward.
Linnae,
Yes, we are definitely surrounded by God’s comfort as we wait for this passage to heaven. Thank you for your beautiful words.
Becky,
Reading your sweet post pulled on my heart strings and brought tears to my eyes. A loss for adequate words. Heaven❤️ Earthly goodbyes ? Hope ?
Cheryl,
I love that you ended your comment with the word hope. It’s what all of life boils down to.
Love you!
How wonderful that you are all able to spend this time with Ken and Vernie (Happy birthday Vernie!!) making these last memories.
Praying for you all.
Lee Anne,
So grateful we’ve been given the opportunity to make these last memories. We will treasure them.
Tears. So thankful you all could be there. ❤️
Love, Deb
Thanks, Deb. Thankful, indeed.
This post is so happy and so sad at the same time. I’m so glad that you all are getting to spend so much quality time with Ken. The pictures of Sarah and her grandpa are precious. I know it’s such a wonderful gift for Steve’s mother to have you all there with her during this time. Praying for continued peace and comfort for your family.
Gayle,
Happy and sad are perfect words for our time together. We’ll be laughing one moment and crying the next. Grateful for time together . . .
I’m so happy that y’all are able to spend precious time with Ken…in your photo with him just above the photos of Sara with him, Ken reminds me so much of Steve…I’m also glad y’all are able to be support Vernie during this time…please wish her a very happy, happy birthday for me. Prayers for all of you…for peace, comfort, discernment, and for a peaceful passing for Ken.
Sue Ellen,
Yes, more and more Steve reminds me of his dad in different things he says and does. Which is a very good thing!
Thank you for your prayers.
Oh I’m so late to the news of Ken. Such a sweet man and how wonderful for him to have all his family members surrounding him with love. In the photos I see that he still has his sparkle, there might be a little life left in him yet. Hugs to you and may he have a calm settling in period with hospice. You all are making wonderful memories and the effect of music can never be overestimated. Steve, such a precious thoughtful gift to your dad.
Lesley,
Yes, that sparkle still shines! I would imagine that even moments before death, it will be there–damped down but glowing still.
Thank you for your sweet words.
I’m so happy that you all have this time together. It is a sad time, but you are making special memories, for sure!
Lord’s Blessings to you all!
Krista,
Memories and blessings. That’s what is filling our days!
So glad each of you were able to spend time with Ken. In reading about him, have a feeling he would be someone I would like to have known and talked with. I can see where Steve gets his humor – wonder trait to have passed down. Not sure if this is the proper thing to say, but it’s almost like waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for that phone call. How wonderful to be able to share with him and he with you about going Home. Ken’s desire to see Vernie reminds me of a story I heard on Facebook regarding a gentleman who went to sleep every night with his wife’s framed picture. The nurses were so loving to him that they had a pillow case made with the man’s wife’s picture on it, so it would be nicer to cuddle than a picture frame. It reminded me of Ken’s and Vernie’s love for each other.
Sharyn,
Oh, I love the story about the pillowcase with the picture. Such a grand idea and such wonderful nurses to think of doing it.
Yes, it is very much like waiting for the other shoe to drop–knowing that any moment could bring the phone call.
And I agree, you truly WOULD have enjoyed spending time with Ken. He never met a stranger.
Glad that Nathan was able to get to see his grandfather. I’m sure having you, Steve and Sarah there is such a blessing to Vernie. Continued prayers for all of you. Happy birthday to Vernie.
Phyllis,
It was beyond special to have Nathan there and so grateful that he got two visits. Thank you for the prayers!
I cannot express how much this lightens my heavy heart. As I prayed so often in the last few weeks that Vernie could see Ken again in person, it seemed to me it was almost an impossible hope in these times. It reminds me that my God is so big and can have plans even bigger that I can imagine. For all of you to get to spend time with Ken multiple times and to be here with sweet Vernie at this time and on her birthday is such a blessing to all of you and to all of our Paw Creek Church family who love them both so much. Prayers for peace and comfort for all of you!
Debbie,
I’m so glad the stories have helped to brighten your heart. Steve had also been praying that he would be able to see his dad again before he died; so grateful.
Pastor Elliott stopped by the house on Sunday and prayed with us; that was very kind of him.
So thankful for his faith and the peace y’all have. May God continue blessing and keep us posted. Love and hugs. Happy Birthday to Vernie.
Ann,
Faith, peace, blessing, love, hugs. Thanks for the beautiful words today.
Praying for you as you are at Duke today.