I originally started the post below last fall and meant to post it back then. But it actually turned into a post-in-progress, meaning I came back to it several times over the course of several months and finally ended up finishing it today. I decided to go ahead and post it now, even though the fall season has passed. It’s one of my introspective posts, the kind that brings me both tears and smiles.
Before Sarah started her first year of college, I went into the campus bookstore to pick up some textbooks for her. As I was turning from the cash register to leave, I was surprised to find myself wiping away tears.
Anyone who knew me would probably guess that the tears were because my youngest child was headed to college. But that wasn’t it.
The reason I was crying was because I never went to college. And although I am now a 53-year old grandma of dubious health and unyouthful proportions, I still catch myself—at unexpected moments– crying for the college student I never was.
There was another poignant moment that caught me unawares when Sarah and I were touring Campbell University. As we were walking through the Fine Arts building with our tour guide, he gestured down the inviting expanses of the Music Department hallways and described all the activities that took place in the classrooms there. Before I was even aware of what was happening, my eyes started to prickle again.
The College Longing . . . it never seems to fade.
Neither of my parents graduated from college, nor did any of my five siblings. (Although several did attend for a couple of years.) We didn’t have a lot of money growing up and college degrees just seemed far and away beyond our reach.
Which was actually pretty much fine with me back then because ever since I was a child, my biggest, brightest dream was to travel and write and perform music. That was it. And I couldn’t get through school fast enough.
ln fact, I actually left high school altogether for a little while when I was in the tenth grade (long story) but I eventually managed to earn my High School diploma through an amalgam of home school and a private academy. Since I married Steve when I was just nineteen years old, I like to tell people that I was a high school dropout and a teenage bride—just for a little shock value.
In the early years of our marriage (before there was this new-fangled invention called online learning), I spent two years doing correspondence work through Berean University, a school affiliated with our denomination. I got my diploma and then went through the challenging process of gaining credentials as a Licensed Minister which means, among other things, that I am fully qualified to marry and bury.
But during those years of correspondence study, I never had a classroom experience and I was never immersed in the atmosphere of learning that college attendance provides. I am such a learner at heart that part of me still longs to be a young adult, picking up books from the school bookstore that have my name in them, not my daughter’s. And part of me wants to walk down those hallways at Campbell University and learn how to make music with knowledge, not just music with heart.
I know that people say, “It’s never too late to go to college” and I know that’s true. I probably will take some courses here and there in the subjects that I love.
But as the last days of summer stitch themselves into the first days of fall, as bright-eyed students gather up their shiny, unbroken-binding books, as new knowledge begins to wend its way into fresh, young minds–I pause for a moment and I think of bends in the road and choices made.
And every once in a while when we meet new people and they ask, “So where did you go to college?” I can still feel the nigglings of insecurity nibbling away at my self-esteem and self-confidence.
But thankfully those nigglings don’t come as often as they used to because I’ve learned that the real answer to their question is not that I didn’t go to college. The real answer is that I am still going. Still learning. Still attending class in this wonderful college called Life.
And you know what? I wouldn’t change any of it.
I got to do my dream from the moment I stepped out of childhood and into marriage. I traveled the country. I wrote songs. I recorded a dozen CD’s. I have worked as a partner with Steve for thirty-four years of marriage and full-time ministry.
My college has been my life. My college has been the road, the music, the people, the lives touched and the lessons learned–simply by getting up and showing up every day in this precious, beautiful life that Steve and I have made together.
When it’s all said and done, I am married to a college graduate. My son is a college graduate. My daughter-in-law is a college graduate. My daughter is on her way to becoming a college graduate. I will always be the only non-colleged Smith at our family gatherings.
And at this point in life, all that makes me feel is proud. Proud of them. Proud of their accomplishments. Proud and thankful that I have ended up with such a wonderful group of people in my life.
I learn from them every day and I hope that in some way, they can learn a little from me–the non-college educated mama and grandma of the clan. The woman who will always love books and learning and knowledge; the woman who will always tear up a little when the leaves fall and the clock on the college tower proclaims that the time for a new season has arrived.
God bless those bright new students as they go forward into their chapters of learning.
And God bless this middle-aged lady who continues to love, and live, and learn, and find contentment in the choices she’s made.
I’d love to hear from you. What choices have you made in life that still affect you now? What might you have done differently? Are you at peace with the choices you’ve made?
And since I’ve been writing about college today, I thought it would be fun to revist some photos from Nathan’s college graduation in 2011 which took place just a couple of months before he got married.
Meagan and her sisters.
Nathan and Meagan’s college campus. Southeastern University, Lakeland, FL. (Meagan’s parents, two sisters, and brother-in-law also graduated from here.)
I didn’t go to college, and I have not regretted it. I guess that life teaches you a lot as you go through it. Some things can’t be taught in school, college. That is not to diminish anyone who can make it through college, it is admirable. My point is that we need to walk the way God has cleared the path for us through life whatever that is. Using the gifts and talents He has given us.
Everyone is special, with or without college, But then I know that you, Becky know that. I am not telling you anything new.
God Bless you.
Paula
Paula,
Very good point! The important thing is that we find the road we are meant to walk and walk it. We can’t walk anyone else’s road, that’s for sure!
Choices.
Uhm this is not school related. But again I think it has something to do with choices. Last year I tried to end my life twice. The reason why I will not go into details, but I was suffering from a depression that led to psychosis so in the end life felt like a dark tunnel without light. To me it was also a choice. One year later I am still here and I am glad to be here and I am no longer depressed or psychotic. But it still affects me. Mentally yes. But also in a way that it has made me think of life. It has made me value life. It has made me learn a lot about myself. Improved my relationship to my mum because she realised I matter to her – our relationship used to be rough. Would I have wish I was without it those expiernces that trauma? In some sense yes but in some sense no because it has made me grown up.
Trine
Dear, dear Trine,
Thank you so much for being brave enough to share your story with all of us here at Smithellaneous; I know that took a lot of courage.
I am so very, very glad you have made the choice to live, to find your future, to realize you are loved, to understand that you are important, and valued and needed.
Even though I’m sorry you went through a depression that made you want to end your life, I’m thankful that the experience has helped you learn about yourself and value life. And I’m especially thankful that you and your mom’s relationship is better than it has been in the past. I especially loved your statement, “She has realized I matter to her.”
You DO matter to her. You matter to us. You matter to God.
I prayed for you today and will continue.
Thank you again for trusting the Smithellaneous community to hear your story and hear your heart.
Dear Becky,
You are right . It did take a lot of courage to share. But in the end I thought that the Smithellanous community has shared so many hardship with each other that I thought it would be ok to share the story. Also because I don’t think mental health should be a taboo.
Your reply made me very touched. Thanks for praying for me. 🙂
Hi Trine, you are a brave woman to stay in the fight and not give up. Our family prayed for you tonight after dinner. Jesus loves you. Grace and peace.
I’m glad you prompted me to come read these comments.
I graduated a semester early from high school and went to the University nearest my home (thereby “blowing away” the four-year full-ride I had at Georgetown University). I moved into the dorm, and had the time of my life – the best four months I could ever have imagined. Thanks to Facebook, I’ve reunited with the five people who I spent the most time with during those months. Did I go to class? At first, yes – but then I found friends who played games (Backgammon, chess, D&D, Pente, Othello) all night and ate horrible-for-us food and yes, drank a lot of beer. Oh it was SO.MUCH.FUN. Do I regret that semester, where I “earned” a 0.67gpa? Nope. Not in the least – because it was my first time out from under my parents’ uber-restrictive thumbs and I did EXACTLY what I wanted to do!
But it wasn’t without penalty: my dad refused, from that point, to pay for any more college. So I got a job (at a bank) and saved half of each paycheck for 8 months. Then I went to the local community college and re-took the classes I had failed – pulling A’s and B’s. I showed my grades to my dad, and his reaction was, “That’s nice. But I’m still not paying for any more school.”
I got another job, saved half of THAT paycheck too, and started full-time at the community college (where I also made some of the best friends EVER) and earned my Associate Degree. I then moved in with a family member and went back to the same nearby university to continue my education (paying for everything – which is why I lived with a relative instead of in the dorm – to save money). I changed my major half-way through my junior year (from business to pre-med), which put me “behind” in finishing in four years. I was then half-way through my fifth year – and one semester from graduating – when I met my first husband. We got married, and he joined the Army – and that was the end of my college career.
We were married five years, and in that time, we lived in four different places (including Germany), and we had a baby (who is now 25). Then I was a single mom for several years until I met/married Mike.
I never went back to school, although I’ve always wanted to. I’m at the point now, though, that my career would not benefit in any way from the $$$$ investment needed to finish my Bachelor degree.
I’m the first person in my family who has NOT completed college – in three generations. My parents both have degrees (mom – BA; dad – BS, MS, MSE); grandparents (teachers, engineers); great-grandparents (teachers). It’s hard being the “uneducated” one at family gatherings.
~Stefanie in STL
Stefanie,
I loved reading your comment–the ups and downs, the determination, the decisions (and friends) that you made along the way, the disappointments and successes. What a story!
I truly admire the way you worked so hard and saved half your money; not an easy thing for anyone to do, let alone a young adult. That took a lot of discipline.
It’s nice to know your story had a happy ending and you married your “handsome Brit.” I’m sorry though, that you feel the sting of being the “uneducated one” at family gatherings. (And what an accomplished family you have!) I hope that they are able to see and appreciate all that you have accomplished in life.
Very few of our stories ever turn out exactly as planned but you landed on your feet and it sounds like you are content with your life.
I’m glad my encouragement brought you over to the comments and glad you took the time to write your story. Thank you; I so enjoyed reading it.
Coming back to respond to you, Becky. I don’t know that it’s so much the sting of being the uneducated one as it is being a disappointment to my parents/grandparents. It was truly never a question of “Are you going to college?” but “Where are you going to go to college?”
Stefanie,
I hear you. Parents and grandparents are the kinds of people we always want to please, and never disappoint.
I know you have a dozen other qualities and attributes that they love, though!
I went to college for one year and stopped because I got married, I had wanted to be a 2nd grade teacher. but I digress. I had 4 kids in rapid succession and then soon after was divorced, I had to work at low paying jobs to support us. since then I have taken a class here or there, even did a semester at one point. Since I ended up needing to support the kids I do wish I had gone to college or to somewhere to learn a trade to make more money to support my family, but they are all grown now and in their 40s and 50s and doing ok, and that’s the main thing at this point.
Sharon,
My hat is off to you!
Four kids, a single mom, working hard to support them all, managing to take some college courses along the way, and now they’re all grown and doing well?
You are an inspiration!!
Abraham Lincoln, considered by many to be our greatest president, didn’t go to college. Sweetheart, I believe that you would have loved college and am saddened by that you didn’t get to go. However, your voracious and expansive appetite for reading and learning easily puts am you a collegian to shame. Chin up kiddo!
Steve,
Well, I did get to attend Life College with husband/roommate/colleague/partner-in-crime, Steve Smith, so I don’t think I’ve missed out on much. 🙂 Love you! Thanks for always encouraging me.
I understand your feeling! Never finishing college is one of my biggest regrets in life at 50 years old. I almost finished my first two years at the local community college, but I got married and spent a year living in Germany with my first husband, who was in the Army. The marriage didn’t last, and I came home from Germany and was single again soon after, but somehow never managed to finish college. I got a job, and other stuff just got in the way. I don’t regret it as much as I used to, as I think living overseas for a year and getting to travel in Europe was an education in itself. My version of college, I suppose. But I’ve always longed for the whole away from home, dormitory living experience of college that I never had. It’s probably the only real regret I have right now. I get a feeling of sad longing when I think about it. But my experience of going overseas for a while gave me a love of travel and the courage to go to new places, so I guess it sort of counts as a form of education!
Melissa,
I definitely agree. Getting to spend a year traveling through Europe was most certainly a form of college. Think of all the learning and stretching and growing you did during that time! A dream come true, for most people.
On the other hand, I can certainly relate to your “feeling of sad longing’ when it comes to not going to college. The bottom line though, is that I think we have both found peace and contentment in our lives and in our choices and that is most important. Thanks for telling your story!
I just wanted to chime in and share my perspective as a recent college graduate. I found myself at university studying engineering, and many of my peers had parents who had gone to graduate school. I have been asked many times where my mom and dad went to college, and I can tell you that nothing makes me prouder than telling my friends that my dad, the smartest man I know, dropped out of school to play music because that’s what he was good at and wanted to do. I think that anyone who knows what they want to do and goes out and does it is brilliant. College is for folks (myself included) who don’t know enough to do what they want to do when they finish high school.
Robin,
I just have to say I love your little snippet about your parents, and especially your dad–the smartest man you know dropping out of school to play music. Since Steve and I were both full time musicians for fifteen years, I can offer a big “Yay!” for your dad. So many artistic people never follow their dream and I’m glad to know that your dad did. Good for him!
And your closing line, “College is for folks (myself included) who don’t know enough to do what they want to do when they finish high school” certainly provides food for thought. I think it’s a little crazy sometimes that 18-year olds are even expected to know how they want to spend the rest of their life. Going to college is great for most of them but for others, it’s not the answer. We all have to find our own path to walk.
Thank you for taking the time to chime in here!
Becky, sometimes college does not make a person any better. I think just being the person God intended you to be is the best. I graduated from college with an education degree and taught for 14 years. Then I became a social worker and stayed with that for 25 years. My youngest brother did not go to college but did as much or more in life than we others did who did graduate from college. If you truly want that go for it. My Daddy went back to school after 30-40 years and got his GED. He was so proud. You are an inspiration to so many. I thank God for making you who you are.
Ann,
I am so proud of your dad for going back and getting his GED after several decades. What a great day that must have been when he finally got it–I know your family all celebrated with him and for him.
What a wonderful story!
I went to college right out of high school. No one in my family had ever graduated from college so I was the first to actually graduate. I worked in the summers in the kitchen at a church camp, at a garment factory and helped on a paper route to put myself through college, along with taking out some student loans. My parents helped as much as they could, which wasn’t a lot. I feel like I appreciate my education more than some that got everything handed to them. My undergraduate major was accounting. Twelve years after graduating I decided to sit for the CPA exam. This was back when you had to take the entire exam at once and couldn’t even use a calculator. I didn’t take a review course but bought a new Intermediate Accounting book (mine was a little dated) and a study guide. I set up a study schedule and stuck to it. I passed three out of four parts the first time and the remaining part the next time. I had a co-worker that had just graduated college who took a review course. She took it at the same time I did and didn’t pass a single part. After passing the exam, I started work on my MBA in Finance. I only took one class a semester as I was working full time so it took about 2 1/2 years to complete.
I have a cousin who is in her mid 50’s who still doesn’t know what she wants to be when she grows up. She has gone to school for more than one thing only to move on to something else.
I know one person who has two masters degrees but doesn’t seem to have any common sense so a degree isn’t everything. For me it was the right thing but I know a lot of people that don’t have one that have done just fine in their lives. I think the key is a thirst for knowledge which it’s very evident that you have!
Phyllis,
What a great accomplishment to be the first in your family to graduate from college. And you’re absolutely right when you say you appreciate it more than most do, because it wasn’t handed to you. Sounds like you worked extremely hard for your education and that is to be admired.
I was amazed to hear that you passed 3 out of 4 parts of your CPA exam when the recent college graduate didn’t pass any of them! You must have some great study skills and obviously, a good brain to go with them.
Congratulations on all that you have worked for and accomplished in your life–you’re a good example of someone going after their goals with passion and determination
Phyllis, as a CPA and a community college faculty member teaching accounting, you are my rock star!!
To everyone else: as others have mentioned, the degree itself isn’t the most important thing. All of life has educational opportunities, it’s what you choose to to do with those opportunities that makes you educated.
Becky, to me, you have always impressed me as a very educated, talented, and Godly woman, author and musician!
Nancy,
How sweet of you to affirm Phyllis; thanks for doing that! 🙂 And thanks for your encouraging words to me.
You’re right about all of life being an educational opportunity. Everywhere we look, every day, every moment, there are things to observe, study, and learn from. This whole world is one great big, wonderful university!
Hey Becky , I went to college for about a nano second for early childhood care. But really the only thing I ever wanted was to be a wife and a Mom. That’s it!! I even wanted a special needs child! I got that! So if I had it to do over Id do the exact same thing. I love my life as a wife and motherhood! I want my kids to do college but as for me I don’t regret not finishing!! I got the life I always wanted! God is good!!
Catherine,
What joy to read your comment, knowing what a great mom you are to Zach and Sarah. When we had you in our youth group all those years ago (thirty years?) we knew you to be such a sweet young lady. I’m so glad your life has brought you joy and contentment. Hugs to you today.
I went to college. paid for it myself through summer jobs, college jobs and a few loans. My mom never graduated from college because she was afraid of the water and back in the day you had to pass swimming to graduate. She was so insistent that all 5 of us go to college because she said “it teaches you to think…and live on your own” She never had the experience but I thank her for encouraging me and my siblings to do so.
Elizabeth,
I have to say that out of all the comments that have come in from this post, none of them made me say, “WHAT??!!” like your comment did. I was not aware that colleges used to require a student to pass a swimming test in order to graduate and I’m so sad for your mom that she didn’t go to college simply because she was afraid of water! So thankful THOSE rules of changed–that is downright crazy!
She sounds like a great lady, encouraging all five of you to have the experience she never got to have. And it is amazing that you paid for your whole education yourself–quite an accomplishment!
Becky I went to college for 2 years after high school but in those years the first 2 years were for general studies & the last 2 for your major. Everyone was either a nurse or a teacher & neither one interested me so I went to work & have never regretted it. My husband has his Masters so that’s enough for our family!
Margie,
I love your words, “I have never regretted it.” That is a beautiful way to live life!
Well I kind of have the opposite problem. I am a little ashamed of it, and very self-conscious about it. Here it is. I graduated from a four year college with my RN(Associate degree) and a BS degree with a major in nursing. This was back in 1982, when most RNs did not have a bachelor’s degree. I was among the few and didnt really understand it at that time. My focus was on marriage and family. For the last 25 years, I have had this advanced degree that I have never used. Even today, I see so many RNs busting their butts to get the BS degree and then going forward in the nursing field i.e. moving away from direct care toward management etc. I feel like I have wasted this degree and wish I could give it to someone who would use it. What a waste.
I just wanted to be a mother and became a nurse because I knew I could get a job anywhere and the field has flexible hours, to work around the kids’ schedules. And it has served me very well in that way. But I never used the BS degree. I barely used the RN degree, most of my jobs were also able to be done by LPNs. I just wasnt driven to advance in the nursing field. Well, parenthood was my priority and I certainly don’t regret that.
Lesley,
Whether you ever feel like you really use your advanced degree or not, I for one, am proud of you for getting it! That took a lot of work and study and determination, especially when not many people were doing that sort of thing. Kudos to you for finding a career that worked so well with motherhood and kudos to you for setting a standard of excellence–in your schooling, in nursing, and as a mom.
And most of all, thanks for taking the time to share your experience and your story.
Well, I graduated Magna Cum Laude, so I guess there’s that. Thank you for your kind words.
Lesley,
Magna cum laude? Wow! Smart lady!!
Oh Becky, I fear that this may be a long winded post but here goes. First of all, I congratulate anyone who starts and finishes college/university but I do not believe that a graduate is any better of a person than one who does not go and it does not mean that they are any smarter either.
I went to college right out of high school for accounting. In Canada we have college and university. College you get a diploma and university you get a degree. My college was approx. 1/2 hour from where I lived in a large city and my cousins lived in this city so a roomed there. My cousin who is an absolutely wonderful person and does not believe that she is any smarter or better than anyone else, comes from a family that could afford to put all 4 children through university.
One year my our Grandmother sent Easter cards and there was a note inside my that said “I am so glad that you are going to make something of your life. I suppose there is still hope for (my youngest brother’s name). I was in complete shock that my Grandmother thought this way and yet not in shock at all. There was a $100.00 bill in this card also that I wanted to send back but my mother would not let me.
My father (her youngest son) actually received his millwright papers by being “grandfathered” in. If you don’t know what that means, it means that he had enough knowledge by doing hands on all his life, he did not have to go to school and take the tests. She never acknowledged this at all. All of my brothers were working full time and were not trouble makers or drug addicts or anything like that yet she just couldn’t see where they would amount to anything in life. I NEVER told my dad about this note although he knew what she was like.
I ended up not finishing college and yes, I guess a bit of me does wish that I had but I am also doing exactly what I started college for and I am a lot less in debt and as an accountant, that is a good thing. 🙂
There are many jobs that do not require a college education and pay just as well. Many of those jobs create things for people that have college/university educations and they have no idea how the product is even made.
I think that as long as you are doing what you love to do and are happy in life, no amount of college/university education can change that and I think that in your circumstances you probably saved yourself a lot of money and you are doing exactly what you would have been doing had you gone to college.
Mel,
I’m sorry things were complicated in your family’s relationship with your grandma. Sounds like you used a lot of wisdom in not telling your dad about that letter she sent. I know you must have been so proud of him for earning his millwright papers through his on-the-job experience. (I had to look up the word millwright; I had never heard of it!) College is great but there is nothing quite like hands on experience.
And I’m so happy to hear that you have been able to successfully pursue the career you wanted even without finishing college. Good for you!
Your words, “I think that as long as you are doing what you love to do and are happy in life, no amount of college/university education can change that” are so very true.
Thanks for sharing a part of your life with us.
Becky, book-lover and knowledge-lover, you don’t need college to be a life long learner;
you’ve definitely proven that.
Mrs. Pam,
Life long learner. That’s a great title to have!
I, too, did not go to college, never had the desire. I guess because I didn’t have enough confidence in myself, just felt I would not do well, but I married a man who received a BA in chemistry. His line of work had nothing to do with chemistry, but he worked for the Billy Graham Assn. for 40 years – in computers. I have to say Amen to the others who have applauded you and what the Lord has done with and for you in these many years. I too think you should take at least one class, to go through those hallways and classrooms, to fullfil that desire of your heart. You go girl!!
Sharyn,
How wonderful that your husband has worked for BGEA for so many years! I know you’re proud of him for all that he has contributed to that great organization!
Isn’t it funny how so many times the thing people get their degrees in turns out to NOT be what they actually do with their lives?
Thanks for your encouragement to me to take some courses. I appreciate your cheering me on! 🙂
I went to a community college for 2 years – never received a degree. However, Becky, I would like to join your “class” and honor our “degrees” in life. Tougher than any prettily bound piece of paper bestowed at a ceremony. Do not get my wrong! My two girls’ accomplishments in school – especially college – make my heart and chest swell with pride, wonderment and envy. I wish I would have received a degree of some sort. It would have made my earning power a lot greater than it is now. As a single parent/person now for more than 27 years, the future is a little tenuous as far as my financial security. There are so many choices that would have made me more settled and secure but somehow, some way, my girls and I have always put one foot in front of the other and kept working hard and diligently (their work ethic is amazing) and we get through life appreciating the struggles and reveling in the accomplishments and happy times. So many choices, too many to name – so many I would have changed – but the biggest one if I had changed it, would not have led me to being the mother of two of the best women anyone could ever know or love.
Becky, someone earlier said that you are her hero. I echo that – no, I shout that – you are a hero to me on so many levels and you are still on my bucket list. That is a choice I am very pleased to have made.
Please do what you say – take a college class, in a classroom or lecture hall, inhale the wonderful scent of academia and hold dear all that you learn and see – too many young students don’t get it yet but we do – so go get some of it, my friend.
Mary H, I couldn’t have said it any better. I’ve been a single mom for almost 27 years and identify well with your comments. Between you and Becky, I ‘ll have used the whole tissue box!
Guerrina,
I know. Wasn’t Mary’s comment so poignant and wise? Hugs to you, dear lady!
Thank you, Guerrina and Becky. I am very touched and encouraged by your words.
Mary,
You may have never earned a degree but that sure doesn’t stop you from being able to write with great poignancy, insight and wisdom. Thank you for your story and your beautiful words.
Your daughters are so blessed to be able to call you “Mom.” You may not earn as much money as you might have with a college degree but you have certainly been a success in all the most important areas of life. You are loved by those two amazing daughters and one even-more-amazing grandson.
What more could any woman ask for?
Blessings on you, my friend. Your words mean so much.
You’re right, Becky…you have an amazing and a full life. Your intelligence makes itself known every time you use a keyboard and, I’d guess, every time you open your mouth. You’ve done a lot in your life, much of it wonderful.
So, yeah, you have never, nor will you ever, need that college experience to earn $$$. But if not having it bothers you so much that you tear up in college book stores, then you need it for you! Your children are raised, so now you’re in the self actualization phase of your life. The “just do it” phase.
Online courses are OK, but if I were you I’d sign up for at least one in-person course at the 2-year college Sarah’s attending. No need to worry about the age difference between you and your classmates. I went back as an adult, and I drew crowds of young students just by virtue of being old enough not to make stupid mistakes!
Jan,
“I went back as an adult, and I drew crowds of young students just by virtue of being old enough not to make stupid mistakes!”
That part of your comment definitely made me smile!
And yes, there is no reason why a person of ANY age can’t go back to a classroom. Sarah has mentioned several times that there are “older” students in her classes. Learning is not limited to age!
Becky,
I am a college graduate, but never worked long in my major of elementary education. I got married young, then had kids at a fairly young age. I ended up homeschooling my kids for many of their schooling years. When people would ask me my major, I would reluctantly reply Elementary Education. Many would say, “Oh, then you are qualified.” I would jump on that like a cat on a mouse and declare NOOOO!!!
What I learned as a homeschooling mama, at least the kind of homeschooling we did, was to allow my kids to be curious creatures. And to realize that I could be curious too. I didn’t realize that so much in my younger, schooled days. I just followed and learned what was put in front of me.
We are students of LIFE, and we will be that until our last breath.
You have so much to be proud of, including having a pride in yourself.
Wonderful post! Thanks for sharing!
Ann,
That is so very true–people don’t seem to value curiosity as much any more. One thing I admire about Steve is that he is continually and always curious about everything–always ready to ask a question to better understand how something works.
The curious person is the eternal student.
As a fellow homeschooling mom, I know the joy of getting to be the one to teach our children the joys of curiosity and joys of learning. No greater privilege.
Wow! Just wow! You’re my hero!
Thanks, Honey, for always being my biggest cheerleader.
Becky, I did go to college right after high school. It was always expected and always something I knew I’d do. I met my husband the first week I was at school and we got married after my sophomore year/his junior year. We stayed at school one more year and he graduated and went into the Army to fly helicopters. I thought I’d stay and finish up my last year while he was in flight training, but only lasted one semester before joining him in Alabama. Long story short, I had two wonderful babies within a few years of flight school graduation and we began moving around every couple years. This was also before online learning. When my kids were in upper elementary school and junior high my husband decided I should finish the degree I was so close to completing. I’d always wished I’d finished and never thought I would. I just knew that it had been so many years that I’d have to start over. My husband took it upon himself to check into it without me knowing and found out that I only needed two courses in order to get my degree. He made a distance learning arrangement for me with our university in Washington state and from Kentucky I finally finished my degree 17 years later. This allowed me to apply to be a substitute teacher after our next move to Alabama and I’ve been doing it ever since. I was so happy to have finally finished what I’d started so many years before. I know my children were proud of me, and both are now college graduates, too. It’s never too late. 🙂
Gayle,
Good for YOU for finishing your degree 17 years later and good for your husband for pulling for you and making it happen. You are a great team and I’m so proud of you!
I’m also impressed that your husband is a helicopter pilot. Steve has always said that that it is very difficult task.
Thanks for inspiring me with your story!
My husband and I never went to college and we always have wished we had. We also married young. I was 18 and he was 21. We waited seven years before starting our family. We have now been married 42 years with 3 children. Our oldest has earned her doctorate and is doing very well. The other 2 went to college also and are doing very well. I think even though you don’t go to college you learn things everyday. Plus I think we learn from our children too. I consider being very fortunate for the life we have had. No regrets.
Shawn,
Three college graduates in your family and one of them with a doctorate? I know you and your husband are so very proud of them.
It so true what you said–we learn things every day! And thankfully, we don’t have to go to college to learn!
And I loved your last line, “No regrets.” Beautiful.
I never went to college either and, just like you, have yearned for that experience and especially that college degree. I really wanted to go and I specifically wanted to be a physical therapist but it didn’t happen due to lack of money and my parents’ divorce. Fortunately, things were very different back then and we have done just fine without college educations. We did, however, insist that our children go to college and I am proud to say that they both have excellent college educations and degrees under their belts. 🙂 Here is another choice made: When I was a senior in high school, I was engaged. However, that marriage didn’t happen and I ended up moving out of state and meeting the man that did become my husband. What a blessed chain of events that led to that! Although I wonder sometimes what I would be doing now had I gone to college, I don’t have any regrets over the choices that I made. I am very content and satisfied with my life and with where I am. I feel so blessed every single day!!!
LeeAnne,
I’m sorry that your dreams of college and physical therapy never became a reality but I so admire your great attitude and the way you have built a fulfilling life for yourself and your family. You are content and satisfied and there are few gifts any greater than that.
Isn’t it amazing how far reaching our life choices are? You didn’t marry the guy you were engaged to in High School and ended up marrying someone else. I love how you called it “a blessed chain of events.” How very true that is.
Thanks so much for adding your voice to our conversation!