Picking Off The Burnedness

January 24, 2012

As a pastor’s wife I cook a lot, whether it’s providing a dish for an event at the church, taking dinner to a new mom, or hosting people in our home.  As a result, I am always on the lookout for quick and easy recipes.

Well, imagine my utter and unalloyed joy when I found this recipe with just two ingredients.

Lemon Bars

One 16 oz angel food cake mix
One 15 oz can of lemon pie filling
Mix ingredients together and bake in a 9×13 cake pan at 350 degrees for 20 minutes. As they are cooling, you can sprinkle with powder sugar if you wish.   

It wasn’t too long after discovering that recipe that the day came when I needed to provide not one, but two desserts for two separate events.    It was actually supposed to be my day off but I thought, “How long can it take to throw together a couple easy recipes?  I’ve got the easy lemon bar dessert in my arsenal and I can do peach cobbler and it won’t take long at all.”

And so I set myself to baking.

I whipped those two ingredients together, patting myself on the back the whole time for finding a recipe that was not only easy but also delicious-sounding.

When the oven timer beeped, I ran to the stove with alacrity, anxious to see firsthand the dessert masterpiece I had created in just a few minutes of time.

Lovely, isn’t it?

DSC_0093

Um.  Unfortunately those are not my bars.

No, these are my bars.

misc small camera nate and meg 027

Have you ever tried cutting something into square bars that is endued with a pudding like viscosity?

It ain’t purty.

misc small camera nate and meg 026

After I had stared in horror at my lemon non-concoction  for a few brief moments, I sent a quick email to the lady I got the recipe from to see what I might have done wrong.  We finally figured out that in the original recipe, she had neglected to post the can size for the pie filling and I had gotten a can that was 8 ounces bigger than what was needed. Hence the gooey, non-bar like bars.  She apologized profusely for the mix up and immediately went back and put the actual quantities in her recipe.  (And by the way, the quantities in the recipe posted here are the correct ones.)

So.

I sat there for a minute and pondered.  I had less than an hour before the first dessert was supposed to be marching out the door in the hands of my hubby and I just wasn’t quite sure what I was going to do.

Then it (happily) occurred to me that since I had the ingredients on hand for the second dessert (a quick and easy peach cobbler), I could make that for the first dessert and go to Plan C for the second dessert.  So I grabbed the ingredients, threw them together in something close to a panic and stuck the cobbler in the oven.

However, when the timer beeped forty minutes later, the top of the cobbler didn’t look quite brown enough to me, so in an unparalleled show of intelligence, I turned the broiler on high and got distracted doing something else.

When I returned  (and after smoke had started coming from the oven) I witnessed this ruinous sight.misc small camera nate and meg 029

I was now just twelve minutes away from the time Steve was supposed to be leaving with Dessert Number One in tow and I had no more tricks up my dessert sleeve.  So I did what all good cooks to in moments of burnt-top crises–I started picking off the burnedness.   

misc small camera nate and meg 040

Now I realize that picking off the burnedness is not a professional cooking phrase you are going hear bandied about on Paula Deen’s TV show; however, I have a feeling that if you have been cooking for more than a few months,  picking off the burnedness has at one point or another, been an unfortunate part of your life.

However, even after the burnedness picking off had been achieved, said dessert was still lacking quite a bit in the attractiveness department and so I got the idea of enrobing the entire catastrophically ugly cobbler in a delectable white gown of powdered sugar. Because, as we all know, powdered sugar covers multitudinous cooking sins.

And then?  Then it was time to shove the disguised dessert into the hands of my husband as he was walking out the door and move on to my second dessert of the day which was due one hour after the first one.

And I had nothing.

So I rummaged through the freezer in a dessert-finding frenzy and discovered some cheese cake I had flash frozen a few weeks earlier.  And then I remembered there was some sugar cookie dough in the fridge and white chocolate chips in the cupboard so I stuck ye olde chips on ye olde cookies, baked ’em in a flash and arranged the assorted end result in a napkin-disguised, foil pan.

misc small camera nate and meg 045

 

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And then?

I went and had a nap.

And a cookie.

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30 comments so far.

30 responses to “Picking Off The Burnedness”

  1. LInda says:

    Becky . . .
    Have been wanting to try the Lemon Bar recipe, but cna only find the lemon pie filling in the 22 oz can. Where on earth did you find the 15 oz can? Thanks!

    • Becky says:

      Linda, someone else had said they had trouble finding a 15 oz can, although one reader did say she just measured out 15 oz from the 22 oz can. I guess you could sort of “eyeball” it and use about three fourths of the 22 oz can. I never did make it again after making it the wrong way, so I’ve never even looked for the smaller can.

      If you don’t find lemon pie filling in that size, you could possibly look for other flavors of pie filling that come in smaller cans? I think it would be fun to experiment with different flavors.

  2. Jennifer says:

    I made the Lemon Bars tonight but since I could not find Lemon Pie filling in a can (I found every other kind) I used a small box of Instant Lemon Pudding mix (adding the milk) and the bars came out amazing. So simple and fast and yummy at the same time.

    • Melissa says:

      I saw Key Lime pie filling while at the store also…I wonder if that would be good as well?

      • Becky says:

        Melissa, I had been thinking that other flavors would probably be delicious–blueberry, strawberry, etc. Any sort of pie filling. But I hadn’t thought about Key Lime; I bet that would be delicious. Let me know if you try it.

    • Becky says:

      Jennifer, well, aren’t you creative? I never would have thought of getting the lemon pudding mix! To save calories, a person could also get the sugar free pudding and use that. Great idea!

  3. Melissa says:

    Let me just say that I do NOT cook. At all. I’ve always wanted to learn, but it’s never been my strong suit. These bars looked simple, so I gave it a shot. I was a little skeptical, because I couldn’t find the correct size can of lemon pie filling, so I had to measure out the proper amount from a larger can. I made these at 2AM while my husband and son were in bed, just in case they were a disaster, so I could toss them out with no one being the wiser. Let me just say, they turned out great. I can hardly believe that I actually made them. Thanks for the recipe! I may get the courage to try something else soon…maybe!

    • Becky says:

      Melissa, I am so proud of you! Hooray!!! And you can definitely have the extra satisfaction of knowing that your bars turned out way WAY better than mine did! Please keep cooking and letting me know how it goes.

      I’m actually thinking of adding a tab to the recipe area in the next week or two that will include nothing but extra simple recipes, maybe 3 ingredients or less. I’m such a big fan of cooking that I love to encourage those who may not feel confident that they can do it, too! Thanks for sharing your success; it made me smile!

  4. Sharon says:

    I know you’re always trying to find easy things to cook. My easiest thing to cook is a Turkey Breast while I get ready in the morning. This is done in the microwave. Prepare your turkey breast in a cooking bag just as if you were going to put it in a regular oven. Place turkey (in bag) into a microwave safe dish. Place in microwave – cook on high 5 minutes per pound. By the way I head to the shower at this time. When out of shower, beeper is going off on microwave. If your microwave has a turntable, be thankful, if not turn the dish and cook another 5 minutes per pound on medium. I get dressed for the day at this time. By the time I’m ready for the day, I have a delicious turkey breast and by the way, it has browned and very moist.

    • Becky says:

      Hi Sharon, great to hear from a Smithfield friend! And your recipe sounds great and very, very simple which–you’re right–I love! It sounds like a definite keeper.

  5. Ann Martin says:

    I have thrown out food because it was burned. I’ve tried picking the “burnt” out of dry baby lima beans but Jim can taste the burnt anyway. Yes, I’ve picked the burnedness off and use the food sometimes hoping people won’t notice. Not enough experience cooking, I guess. Enjoyed your blog and will try the lemon bars.

    • Becky says:

      Ann, yes, I have also had to throw out stuff that was burned beyond salvaging but in this case, I figured it wasn’t burned beyond the very top layer. If the bottom has burned, well, that’s a whole different story!

  6. Rachel says:

    Here is a quick recipe for a turkey breast in the crockpot similar to the above chicken recipe you posted.

    Thawed Turkey Breast
    6 0z of frozen orange juice concentrate – I never measure and just pour in about a quarter of the can.
    1 can cranberry jelly sauce
    1 package Lipton Onion Soup Mix
    A couple slices of butter off the stick – See I don’t measure and just throw in a little butter!

    Cook on low for about 8 hours in the crockpot. Is really amazing turkey.

    I think I’m going to make this turkey recipe and your lemon bar recipe this weekend if we do a potluck.

    • Becky says:

      Rachel, I am definitely be keeping that recipe. I do love my crockpot and am always on the lookout for good recipes to pop in there before leaving for work. Nothing quite like the feeling of being gone all day and still knowing that dinner will be ready when I get home. Thanks for sharing!

    • Janet says:

      Rachel, how long do you cook this? Low for 8 hours? High for 4 hours? Sounds good and easy – just wondering about how long to leave it in.

  7. Mary H says:

    Okay, that was hysterical. However, I must try the lemon bars – the correct recipe – I have never noticed canned lemon pie filling before – will have to look for that next time. In fact, I may just have to make these this weekend – daughter and grandson will be visiting – those with the Pioneer Woman’s pot roast – sounds like a winner. And, in comment to one of the other comments, Becky, you must check out Pinterest – it is an awesome site – the one pot mac and cheese was a disaster of a dish for a good friend of mine but other recipes have been very good. The crafts are amazing – our Christmas presents were almost all from Pinterest.

  8. Dana H says:

    Oh I only wish I had a picture to show! If we’re talking nightmares in the kitchen I’ve had a few. They usually start out nice I can ususally make something pretty good and tasty the FIRST time I try a recipe. Husband brags and (why he does this I don’t know) calls his mom, sister, one of the kids or even the mailman for that matter and tells them how gooood his supper was! I’m ususally smiling like a frog a frog adn happy that I could please my families taste buds.

    The culprit of this nightmare is names Meatloaf.

    First time Beautiful, as pretty as a meatloaf can possibly be. My husband may have been happier that day than the day we married. He loves meatloaf.

    2 weeks later.the SECOND meatloaf! I’m sassy now. I mix it up put it in the loaf pan pop it in the oven. sit back to relax as the sides cook. I of course change into my grungy relaxing clothes and get my hair in it’s pins and whatever else to hold it away from my face. I look horrific ok.

    We sometimes eat late this was one of those nights it was going on 8 I take the monster from the oven and begin to cut slices so I can put it on a plate it falls to pieces.
    Not pieces that would require some sort firmness. this fell into a pile of mush.
    Husband looks like he could cry, I am completely dumbfounded. Idk what happened.

    I throw a coat on, grab my purse, run to the store pick up a roasted chicken from the deli while looking a horrible mess from all the relaxing I was doing earlier. there were no ph calls made that night and I have yet to make another meatloaf. I’ll have to tell you the story of the homemade biscuits and a call to grandma another time.
    I’m surpised the man eats at all!

    • Becky says:

      Dana, that is so funny! I’m glad I’m not the only experiencing kitchen disasters. And yes, a picture would have been great! 🙂 Good luck on the next meatloaf.

  9. Jan Reynolds says:

    Hilarious! Just wondering if you have checked out Pinterest.com yet?

    • Becky says:

      Jan, I actually do have an account with Pinterest but truthfully, I’m afraid to spend much time there because I’m afraid I will love it too much! I’ve heard so much good stuff about it and how much time people love spending there and I’m just afraid I’ll get hooked. However, I guess I may try to log in there and again and stick one little toe in but not get tooo immersed! 🙂

  10. Mrs. Pam says:

    I have a 2 ingredient recipe that I got from my exercise teacher MANY moons ago

    Chicken Breasts
    Frozen Orange Juice

    Spoon frozen orange juice over chicken, and bake. I can’t remember the temp or the minutes, and
    since I haven’t had a working oven or stove for MANY moons, I haven’t done any baking..so I can’t even guess. But, I bet you can. I do remember that I made it lots if times.

    I imagine your lemon “bars” tasted good… I would have just mixed it all up, and sent it as
    Lemon Surprise Pudding

    • Becky says:

      Mrs. Pam, that sounds wonderful. I did a search for a similar recipe and this is the closet thing I’ve found. Even with a couple extra ingredients, it still sounds simple. I think I’ll give it a whirl.

      6 ozs orange juice concentrate (frozen orange juice concentrate thawed)
      1 packet onion soup mix (dry)
      1 tsp poultry seasoning
      1 tbsp cornstarch
      4 chicken pieces (legs or breasts are best)

      1 Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
      2 In a medium bowl, combine the orange juice, onion soup mix, poultry seasoning and cornstarch. Mix together well and set aside. Place chicken in a 9×13 inch baking dish. Pour sauce over chicken and cover with foil.
      3 Bake at 375 degrees F (190 degrees C) for 45 minutes, remove foil, and bake for 15 more minute

  11. Gail Puckett says:

    Just wondering, (as I too, love quick and easy desserts) is the size of the pie filling correct in the post. Although your lemon bars look scrumptous, the ones above it look like they would go better to my church suppers :-). All kidding aside, I have also picked off burnedness to get a dessert (or mealoaf, or hamburger or just anything) to get it there. Love it when you post recipes, I am always looking for something new

    • Becky says:

      Gail, yes the quantities in the posted recipe are correct; I’ll go back into the post and make that clear. Thanks for mentioning it.

  12. Steve Smith says:

    You are a wonderful cook dear.

    Love, Steve

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